girl, you got to know these days
which side you're on...

It's not even really cold yet, but personally, it's cold enough. We'll be in this house four years in November, and the only year we were actually comfortable in the winter was 2004. We had a little bit of propane that winter, and it was the nicest heat. Every fall after that, we just never had enough money to keep our heads above water, let alone buy gas to heat with. Electric baseboard is heat enough if you're desperate, but it's pricey. As a bonus, our house is wired in such a (sucky) way that the one thermostat is situated directly over a strip of heat. Meaning: as soon as that strip of heat gets warm, the thermostat shuts the whole damn shebangabang off. Niiiice.

On a lighter (and warmer!) note: HALLOWEEN!!! I bought a shit ton of candy at Giant yesterday (all on sale, thank you very much) and I think this weekend we'll finally get the decorations up and the house ready for our party. Just a little bit of cleaning in the dining room and some re-arrangement and we'll be set. We also ...gasping for breath from utter excitement... bought a Wii!!! One of our finer investments, honestly. In the past several months, thanks to getting bills caught up and some paid off (State of MD, Providian, Wells Fargo, Dr. Dormer, just to name a few) we have a copious amount of spending money. Seriously, we bought a ginormous TV with our economic stimulus check, a Wii just for fun, a cruise for vacation, and Jim traded his car in for a 2005 Chevy Colorado. Craziness! Honestly, I'd like to have a lot more locked up in savings, but why not stimulate the economy? And honestly, I don't know how much money I'll be bringing in once I start classes in January, so we'd better spend it now. See why I'm not in financial planning?? hahaha

In all seriousness, life is really, really good. We have been married for three years, honestly and truly happy with each other. Being financially stable is a huge weight off any couple's shoulders, and I can really see how much less stressed we both are thanks to more money intake and less outgoing. I don't feel selfish about first wanting, and now really going, to school, because I am confident that we can make it. I was informed just a few days ago that I am eligible for a Federal Direct Unsubsidized Loan. That's a mouthful! It doesn't quite cover the full tuition for a year, but it's damn close. I did the online loan counseling and signed the master promissory note last night. Good times.

All other news:
-HOCKEY IS BACK! that is all.
-New cookbook: 1000 Vegetarian Recipes Really a nice cookbook. Not bad for $6.99 at Ollie's Bargain Outlet. I'm an Army member, you know. :-P
-Sivan is teaching me how to crochet. I'm not really good at it, but then again I haven't really practiced much since she taught me last wednesday. I've got to get on the ball!
-I've almost lost ten pounds! That's my first goal that I get a reward with. And what's that reward, you ask??

fingerstache! -

throw away yesterday
today is a brand new day

I'm in! Saturday's mail brought me a lovely acceptance letter from UMES and the endearing quote from Jim: "No surprise there." Thanks, baby. :-)

this isn't just in my mind,
we're suspended from space and time...

International Talk Like a Pirate Day! awesome. We're going on a cruise in February to the Bahamas, I'm going to try my best to play a pirate on an island.

I took the initiative to talk to a financial aid counselor on Wednesday. Not really anything I didn't know, but I felt like I had to talk to a real person rather than finding info from the internets. I feel better knowing what kind of paperwork I need to turn in and having a time frame for everything. I have a completed application, the form to get my official college transcript released to UMES, and twenty-five dollars (non-refundable, of course!). Supposing I'm accepted, the financial aid party begins. We make too much money for federal aid, but not enough money to just pull it out of our asses and pay cash. That wouldn't be a bad thing, but keeping up with an old house isn't the cheapest living arrangement. And so, we press on...

And now for something completely different: 6g lobes! very exciting. I feel the need to be more tattooed, but stretching is a *much* less expensive mod, and it's very gratifying. I was skipping two gauges at a time previously (just 14g to 10g), buuut skipping from 10 to 6 was a little more intense. I think I'll stick to one gauge at a time from now on. It's getting to the point now that my co-workers are noticing the size changes. A teensy tiny part of me feels like I'm sticking it to the man just a little bit, and I like it! As per our company dress code, no piercings other than ears are permitted, and absolutely no visible tattoos. Indeed, we are a conservative financial institution. But, I am not a conservative representative for said financial institution. Sadly, I would rather have a consistently paying job than dress/be tattooed/be pierced as I wish I could be. Sometimes we have to make choices that are a means to an end. When my 401k is fully stocked and I don't have to report to someone else for my daily chores, it's on, you best believe it!

In other news, threadless.com has some awesome tees. I got a nine-dollar penguin (!!) shirt and a twelve-dollar non-penguin (is there any other distinction??) shirt. Black, with glow in the dark thingies all over. It don't get much better. Seriously, go there. It's the perfect time of year for new tee shirts! You can wear them under a HOODIE.

Also, more new Pyrex came into the family. Three pieces (one with a lid!) for ten bux. Goodwill, Salisbury. I think I may photograph my queendom of Pyrexia one day, just to watch it expand visually. I think I'm up to maybe twenty pieces now? ... I just had to go count! I was close - twenty-one patterned pieces. Do the batty bat :-D

where do bad folks go when they die? they don't go to heaven where the angels fly.
they go to a lake of fire and fry, won't see them again 'til the fourth of July.

<---originally posted aug. 30, 2008--->

Bug-Out! The biggest all-VW show on the East Coast. I think...

The last one of the year is tomorrow. There's two a year, Memorial Day and Labor Day weekends. Always a good time! Good food, great friends, a (relatively) short drive. Only two and a half, maybe three hours to get there. Typically, we'd go up on Saturday and stay overnight. This particular trip is a one day affair, mostly because of lack of hotel rooms, and a lot of club members being kinda tight on cash. Still, a really good time. I highly recommend it! (Manassas, VA - Google it, yo!)

Exciting news! We now own leether.com! Look for a leslie.leether.com coming to the internets near you!

More exciting news! Sivan, my excellent friend and occasional inspiration, helped me with some ever-exciting spray painting today. We managed to get two kitchen chairs finished, as well as a living room lamp. Also brainstormed ideas for the lampshade, purchased items for said lampshade, and had a lovely dinner at Friendly's in Pocomoke.

Hopefully more craftiness to come :-) I'm taking the fall semester off in anticipation of some remodeling and hopeful admission into the Dietetics program in the spring. yowza. That makes me so nervous, you have no idea. I know I can do it, yes. I'm just feeling apprehensive about the financial part. I haven't been a full-time student in quite a few years, and I (and Jim) have definitely become used to a two-income household. I certainly don't make a lot, but it is enough to cover some bills and stash a little away for a rainy day. I am confident, though! We'll kick ass.

I'm gonna hit the highway like a battering ram, on a silver black phantom bike,
when the metal is hot and the engine is hungry and we're all about to see the light...

<---originally posted aug. 16, 2008--->

It's been awhile!

(four questions)

a. Where did the summer go? b. What the hell did I do with the summer? c. When is it going to be cool enough to wear a hoodie without looking like a tard? d. Wait, I wear hoodies year round anyways... who really gives a crap? hooray hoodies!

(answers?) a. Summer turns to fall. Idiots.

b. Gah, what did I do this summer?? Honestly, it has flown by so it's going to take a little while for me to remember that far back. Let's see... I finished a few more classes, my most favorite being Nutrition (online). I am completely ready to study nutrition/dietetics full-time after taking this class! I was mostly convinced that I wanted to study it, but now I know for sure. There is a program at UMES in their Human Ecology department specifically about dietetics, and I'm going to be meeting with a financial aid adviser within the next few weeks. The fall semester just began, so I was advised to wait at least two weeks before getting in touch with someone over there - they're just a little busy right now. ha! I totally understand.

I've mostly worked all summer, still pressing on at the same old job. My four year anniversary was last saturday, August 23rd. At this point in my life, all that means to me is that I'm more fully vested in my 401k, so when I get to leave and move on to somewhere else, I'll have a little bit more money to take with me and start on another 401k.

The summer was chock full of car shows, and we have definitely been to quite a few. Our SVWAC Aircooled Extravaganza 2 was a HUGE success, and I can say that from the Treasurer's point of view without exaggeration! Every year gets bigger and better, and we are so happy and proud that we can take most of the money we make and give back to the community. Our car club is beginning to get more closely tied to another (much larger) car club, which happens to do a lot of fundraising for local folks in need. We actually took over a show that a now disbanded car club had been doing, and I think the fact that we stepped in like that really impressed some of the older club members. We are a very young club (in age as well as true organization) and that was a good push for us to become more established locally. It's really awesome to be able to do good for the community, as well as meet all kinds of people just through a mutual interest in classic vehicles.

c. I am currently loving my two Old Navy clearance hoodies (grey and maroon), purchased for six dollars each. Thank you to Allison for the idea!

d. I wear hoodies all year round, just to reiterate.

on the sidewalk,
ooo sunny morning
lies a body
just oozin life

<---originally posted mar. 27, 2008--->

Once upon a time, there was a light at the end of my tunnel. For almost four years, it got dimmer and dimmer. I don't know exactly when it went out, but I woke up one day and it was gone.

I was scared.

I had to find my light! I cried and cried, and thought and thought about where my light went. Why would it just go out like that? I thought maybe the dimming would reverse one day, and my light would get bright again. I thought, "it's not that bad, you can make it until (insert catalytic event here) happens!"

NO.

I have spent four years of my life in a job that I once was overjoyed to have. It was a job, and once I thought it might be a career to keep for a while. The more time I spend there, the more my soul breaks into pieces.

I am surrounded by wonderful, miserable people, and I can't take it any longer.

So, I won't take it any longer.

I have a plan.

Wish me luck :-)

I know we're dying
and there's no sign of a parachute
we scream in cathedrals
why can't it be beautiful?

<---originally posted mar. 14, 2008--->

I called out of work today, the first day in several years. The last time I was out, Jim's grandmother died. Today, I went to be with my grandmother. Not on a deathbed, but I don't think she would be opposed to the thought. Four broken ribs, various other nearly-ninety maladies. Considering the other folks in the nursing home, she's doing damn well.

We have never really clicked (according to me). In her eyes, we were best friends until I hit puberty and stopped spending summers as her live baby doll.

With this tension I feel in her presence (mostly due to weight "problems" - her problem with mine*) I was wary of visiting her and possibly caring for her in some capacity. Fortunately, when I do visit her now (in the nursing home/rehab center) I feel strangely helpful towards her. Like I'm a caregiver or a nurse, not a grandchild. Or grandadult. Sadly, or even more strangely, I'm not sad. I think about her death in the future, and I just don't feel anything.

And I don't know what not feeling anything makes me feel like.

*I've always been a plump gal, fine, it's how I do. She seriously would send me these awful letters about losing weight, telling me things like I would lose my job over my body. Really. I do feel fortunate that I've never gotten an eating disorder over this crap, so thanks! I always eat, and I keep it down! Yay!*

On a lighter note, I got a sweet Pyrex dish at the Goodwill Super Store in Easton. It's an avocado green promotional print - Zodiac. And what I thought was a random Pyrex lid to fit it is the actual lid that goes with that promo. Seven bucks! Made a crazy day a little nicer.